10.20.2006
Yellow Silk Woven
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What material is Chris Matthews (of Hardball fame) hairpiece made out of?
I think I have it narrowed down to a few items, but maybe you have your own idea(s). These are strictly conjecture.
1. He shaved the heads of 127 Malibu Barbies and wove the plastic "hair" into a bright yellow wig which he displays proudly on his progam
2. His hairpiece is made from golden corn silk harvested from the rolling fields of Iowa (the state where his heartthrob Obama won his first leg tingling primary)
3. The yellow mass on top of Matthew's head is actually his real hair, but through the years harsh television lights, thick pancake makeup, and increased stress hormones excreted because of deep seated Clinton hatred have combined to create a sort of otherwordly bionic straw-hair. He combs it nightly with Scott's Turf Builder to fill in any thinning spots.
Whatever the situation, I am just fascinated by the mess on the top of this man's head. By far the best angle is when he turns his head slightly and you can see the oh so hillarious side view.
I used my AK 47 to hunt down some wolverines and shave their testicles. Then I made a special blend of dye made from the sweat and milk of a pregnant hippo to create the color and texture he so desires.
What Is On YouTube Today?
Body Heat T-Shirt.wmv
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