Tie 100% Neckties

Why do we wear neckties?
They're uncomfortable, and they're hard to tie. Do they still serve any practical purpose? Did they ever have a purpose beside being an elitist decoration?
When will the necktie no longer be a common fashion accessory? 50 years? 100 years? 1000?...
It's going to take a long time, I think, but whenever it happens, it should have happened sooner. They're just useless.
For over two thousand years - since at least the Quinn dynasty - the necktie (or cravat) has been the most widely used, and the most multicultural of all phallic symbols. The necktie has always been, for a certain class, a celebrated piece of male equipment. The ties were a mark of allegiance, wealth, and belonging at a time when cloth was hard enough to come by for clothes, never mind for articles of gratuitous adornment. They told others, both inside and outside the elite, that the bearers of the neckpieces were the people who mattered - the people who belonged. The tie is a pure fashion statement, a useless, unnecessary item of clothing in addition to its symbolic announcement. However, there are other negative attributes associated with the necktie.
Indeed, the tie was suitably born soaked in blood. The word "cravat" comes from "Croat", the nationality of the soldiers who won Turkey (previously in the Austro-Hungarian Empire) for Louis XIV of France, and who marched victoriously into Paris adorned in colourful silk handkerchiefs tied around their necks. The French King soon copied this style and began a similar fashion among the European aristocravats, pun intended. Indeed, Louis XIV called an entire regiment the Royal Cravattes. Most reference books blame the necktie on the French. The tie evolved from the French cravat, a scarf tied around the neck. The French called it a cravat in reference to the Croatians, who wore colorful scarves around their neck in battle. Considering its origin and symbolic meaning, why do we wear ties now?
Ties which both hang flaccidly from the neck to the groin like a penis, and also point to it, are the very symbol of the phallus, which is so envied by other men and women not for its actual qualities, as much as the social meaning attributed to the gender of its owner. The tie is thus a symbol of the domination of men over women, and of power in general. Consequently, a ruling was made by a particular group...
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